My First Story ?

Hi, I’m new to MarriageHeat and I’m just posting a little about my relationship and about me and how I decided to wait until marriage!

Well, I’m in a relationship with the most amazing man I’ve ever been grateful to call my boyfriend! We have been dating for 1 year and 4 months now and he is a virgin and I’m a virgin.  It wasn’t his choice to wait but he hasn’t had many relationships before me and he always wanted to have sex with someone only if he loves that person. (And I’m that one) ??

We met online, and we only talked for 2 weeks before we finally met after my last day as a junior year in high school. (He is now 21 and we met when I was 18 and he was 20) .We met at the mall, it was amazing and he asked me out that night and I didn’t want to say yes.

I had only known him online for 2 weeks, messaging, and video chat back and forth but that’s all. I wanted to get to know him longer and in person but I did have feelings for him and he had bigger feelings for me and he told me (months later) that if I never said yes I wouldn’t be able to see him anyway because of long distance.

We are a long distance relationship but I see him every couple weeks. So I said yes and then his grandma took me home and it’s been a long story after that ???.  He is amazing and every girl’s dream and the only man that has ever respected me and my wishes and would never hurt me (never has!) and is so loving and caring it’s unreal.

I wanted to make sure I never did anything wrong as a girlfriend to make him unhappy but sometimes his needs get in the way and he gets frustrated. I decided that if I know he is the one and I have been with him for a year, then we can go farther but still no sex.

As for me, I am a virgin by choice but it came natural to me to want to stay pure. Ever since I was really little I always never wanted to do any of that stuff, but as a teen of course I experimented but I never went too far.

I lost relationships because they couldn’t handle me not wanting to have sex or me give oral so they left. I was 15 and my boyfriend at the time broke up with me and as my little freshman girl self thought he was the guy for me.

So after that breakup, I had to find out what my true intentions and purpose were. I decided when I was 16, I would stay pure until I was married and I have done so. I am 19 now and still going strong.

I think as a girl we don’t ever have those sexual urges so it’s easier for us not to give in to those urges. My boyfriend now gave me a purity ring because he knows it would mean a lot to me and he gave it to me because he respects me and is waiting for me and knows he wants to be with me for a long time.

It can be hard sometimes but I’ve never given in to them and I know that I want to live my purpose to the highest extent possible without breaking my self-worth and I indeed have much respect for myself and I will always honor the given right that I am a female and I will stay pure until my honeymoon night! ❀

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6 replies
  1. Harper Shelby Thornton says:

    My dear, girls do have those sexual urges. It's just that men have them stronger and differently I think. God bless you for wanting to remain a virgin until you're married, and let me tell you from experience it's ALWAYS worth it! I was with my husband for 7 years before I married him, and now we've been married 33 years. We had sex on our wedding night, and since then we've had amazing sex, an amazing sex life, in part I believe because we did wait. God always has our best interests at heart, dear. Btw welcome to Marriage Heat! God bless my darling.

  2. PacMan says:

    Lovely story LynnRose! You sound like a smart young lady. I’m thrilled that this young man respects your boundaries. And some don’t agree, but I think singles can enjoy a budding physical relationship in a healthy way (that doesn’t lead to intercourse). However I’m a bit concerned that your BF doesn’t share your convictions but rather is just playing nice. Do you think this will be the man you marry? Quite possibly? If so, how far off do you think the engagement and wedding are, as you speculate? I would much rather you do some “more stuff” based on how far away you think marriage is rather than making it past 1 year in your relationship. My future wife and I had lots of physical fun — making out, dry humping, heavy petting outside of clothes — and we were both quite orgasmic. However, we only really turned up the heat like 3 months before engagement and then we had a short 6 month engagement… so we were on a fast track toward marriage. And we probably would have gone too far if we had to manage for 1-2-3 years. Remember these 2 things… (a) You need to set the boundaries at any given time. Based on what you wrote, your BF will always be “yes.” (b) Go as slow as possible, b/c physical relationships are always forward moving [near impossible to go backwards]. And feel free to share about the journey on this site — it’s fun to read how singles deal With sexuality and relationships.

  3. samanthaketchum1990@yahoo.com says:

    Good for you wanting to stay pure until marriage. I myself sadly was taking advantage of so I didn’t get to give myself to my husband like he gave himself to me the night we got married. Broke my heart, he feel asleep right afterwards and I laid there an cried myself to sleep because of the fact I wasn’t able to give myself to him the way I am suppose to.
    But anyways, I’m proud of you! Not very many women anymore do save there selfs for marriage anymore an that’s truly sad. Yes, ALL women have that need that’s what makes us all human. We have that need to want the opposite sex. That’s how God created us and it it very very hard. But least you have a boyfriend that truly respects you for that.

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